If your partner had an affair and the two of you are trying to rebuild your relationship, you might be feeling jealous fears that he or she will cheat again. Jealousy may even be a relatively foreign experience for you and mainly began showing up after the affair. Or you might have already developed a jealousy habit. Perhaps this partner isn’t the first who has cheated.
You’ve sort of trained yourself to stay on guard for the next betrayal– your jealousy is part of that defendedness. If what you want is to heal your pain, rebuild trust and continue the process of re-connecting with your mate, jealousy is simply not the answer.
It can be an excruciating emotional place to be. You and your mate might be going through a tough time. Tension and distance seems to be growing between the two of you. You can’t figure out what this all can be about and you don’t know how to bring it up with your partner. So you worry. You worry that he or she doesn’t love you anymore. You worry that your mate regrets being in a relationship with you at all. You worry that your partner is having an affair.
If your partner had an affair you might feel like you are justified, or that you have good reasons, for being jealous. “After all,” you might assert, “how can I ever wholly trust him or her again?” After trust has been broken and infidelity has occurred, it can seem nearly impossible to open your heart as fully as you once did to your partner. It might even seem wiser to you to stay on alert for any suspicious signs that your partner is once again cheating. Here’s what to do…
Question: “How do I fix my jealousy issues with my girlfriend? I know she’s with me and I trust her but it’s when other males hit on her that really pisses me off because to me that’s not respectful. If they know she’s with me and they still continue to do it and I’m scared to do anything because I don’t want to get in a fist fight by telling a guy to back off.”